Guest weswes19 Posted January 21, 2003 Report Share Posted January 21, 2003 Ok guys heres my short e-mail to Orange what you think? Dear Sir / Madam A few points about your SPV and dont ignore these as I work within the NHS and a lot of interest have been generated by me purchasing one there are 3000+ staff at the hospital where I work alone You almost made a good phone I use the word almost loosley 1) You advertise the GPRS usage as free ok sure you say due to a resonable use policy 10MB lol Ive never head anything so funny in all my life 10MB I could use that in a day, also nowhere in your Terms and Conditions which are a joke within themselfs does it contain anything whatsoever about being charged for over the use of 10MB not only that but it also says nothing about how much you will be charged £8 per MB over I heard it was are you for real do you know how rediculous that is its laugable from a law point of view you are actually breaking the law by a) charging and ;) not mentioning to the customer the costs of going over the limit and or providing a free means to check thier usage either via the phone itself or as support I have heard all sorts of rubbish about this so why are some people being charged for it I had better not be charged see you in court as they say if I am 2) SmartPhone which part of it is Smart?? the nice shiny silver colour from all I can see whats so Smart about a phone that dosent even perform the most basic of functions is it Smart that your battery runs out everyday and needs charging erm no, is it smart that the main feature people buy it for (GPRS) is charged at a rediculous rate ermm no and is it smart that a phone crashes left right and centre again NO I hope your seeing where this is going Smart the only thing thats smart about it is that it holds my door shut at night, and anohter thing is it smart that the manual dosent cover 40% of the phones features ermm again no 3) Digital Licenses inselfs are jokes its nothing but a money making raquet for yourselfs and Microsoft ok I understand you need to make a profit but locking us down to what you want to thats almost laughing its as though your spying on us again a court case in its own right, I hope you know that they are very very easily unlocked but dangerous to your network as virus can creep in, I work in IT and the last thing you want is a virus on your network and if you try and sue the person resonable Im sure theyd have a lot of ammo to fight back with, to keep everyone happy why not make the phone not use them that way a) the user can develope software that they actually think is good and :lol: your network is safe from virus and hackers use the wonderful Orange Update feature to make this possible 4) Oh sorry I said wonderful Orange update I lied we need an update which weve been promised to fix many many bugs believe you me theres a list as long as my arm 5) Its supposed to be a PDA what a joke my 5 year old cousion can manage my time better with a piece of paper and a wax crayon and finally 6) Orange Support lol do you know what that means do you have a dictionary handy but then will you need a manaual on how to use that as well, my pet cat that has brain damage whos only rubbed himself up against the phone can provide better support By doing all of the above espically the digital software liecenes you are risking lossing most of your SPV customers and they are within their full rights to return their phone as many of us alrady have its a nice phone nice idea but so very very nice Nice Try but no cigar Orange I hope you listen to this and dont just ignore it its for all our benefits, I have had the phone a week and am alrady thinking of switching networks and like I said I work for a very big company dosent look too good does it when the IT Support dosent even buy an IT realted phone think about it and come back with what we all want Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Monolithix [MVP] Posted January 21, 2003 Report Share Posted January 21, 2003 I agree with some of those points. Just be careful you don't let the fact you are irritated exaggerate the facts too much... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest emsoftsys Posted January 21, 2003 Report Share Posted January 21, 2003 I agree with Mono, don't come across so personally! Also (hoping you can accept some criticism)....... check out your punctuation! I would be interested in seeing the response you get! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DJHope Posted January 21, 2003 Report Share Posted January 21, 2003 I agree, sarcasim and ciniscism will get you absolutly NO WHERE with any customer service team, in fact i even had a job reading it since it didnt have much content just more and more sarcasim, dont be so personal be more objective. I do however agree with SOME of the points rasied, but no my phone dosnt hang up,and yes its smarter than any other phone ive ever had! DJ Hope Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest lutzh Posted January 21, 2003 Report Share Posted January 21, 2003 Hi Weswes19, don't get me wrong but your letter sounds like a EMINEM-song about ORANGE :-). This brings you nowhere - while EMINEM rocks through the cinemas and the charts... Cheers, Lutz Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest xanadu Posted January 21, 2003 Report Share Posted January 21, 2003 If that letter arrived in my Inbox, then I would just laugh and delete it !! You can't write a letter like that and expect to get a reply. :shock: :shock: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest wideawake Posted January 21, 2003 Report Share Posted January 21, 2003 I am sorry, but WTF.....eerr yes I agree with some of the points. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest yatpeak Posted January 21, 2003 Report Share Posted January 21, 2003 I have to disagree with points 3 and 4, firstly, orange don't make money out of certification, other companies certify the programs and there really aren't that many bugs on the SPV. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Stef Posted January 21, 2003 Report Share Posted January 21, 2003 10mb? Eh? I had no idea about that! Is this combined GPRS and MMS texting? Looks like I'm not gonna be utilising the many features I bought the bloody phone for! :roll: The way I understaood it was that GPRS and MMS were free till March ish time, when they introduce the differing tariffs for GPRS and MMS becomes pay per message. Am I incorrect? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest crimminsky Posted January 21, 2003 Report Share Posted January 21, 2003 My tea's gone cold I'm wondering why I.. bought this Spv at all The MS clouds are in my window.. But I can't see much all And even if I could it'll all be gray, But your picture on my wall It reminds me, that it's not so bad, It's not so bad.. [weswes19 as 'Stan'] Dear Orange, I wrote but you still ain't callin I left my cell, my pager, and my home phone at the bottom I sent two E-mails back in autumn, you must not-a got 'em There probably was a problem at the your office or somethin Sometimes I scribble words too sloppy when I jot 'em but anyways; fek it, what's been up? Man how's your update? My girlfriend's needs one too, I'm bout to get Irate If I have a daughter, guess what I'ma call her? I'ma name her Spiv I read about your Uncle Bill too I'm sorry I had a friend kill himself over some Glitch wiv windowsCE tm I know you probably hear this everyday, but I'm was your biggest fan I even got the Tube map crap that you did with your cert Scam I got a room full of your posters and your pictures man I like the stuff you did with Hexacto too, that stuff was phat Anyways, I hope you get this man, hit me back, just to chat, truly yours, your ex biggest fan This is weswes19 {Chorus: Dido} [weswes19 as 'Stan'] Dear Orange, you still ain't called or wrote, I hope you have a chance I ain't mad - I just think it's F***** UP you don't answer fans If you didn't wanna talk to me outside your cs room you didn't have to, but you coulda signed an E-mail for Matthew That's my little brother man, he's only six years old We waited in the blistering cold for new Games, four months and you just said, "No." That's pretty shi**y man - you was his blinkin idol He wants to be on Vodafone, he hates you more than I do I ain't that mad though, I just don't like bein lied to Remember when we signed the contact- you said if I'd write you you would write back - see I'm just like you in a way I never knew my facts neither; you always lie and make up stuff about it being Beta I can relate to what you're saying on your site so when I have a shi**y day, I drift away and put it on cause I don't really got sh*t else so that sh*t helps when I'm GPRS'd I even got a tattoo of Orange across the chest Sometimes I even cut myself to see how much it bleeds It's like SLURP, the pain is such a sudden rush for me See everything you say is Boll**ks, and I disrespect you cause you tell it My girlfriend's jealous cause I talk about you 24/7 But she don't know you like I know you O, no one does She don't know what it was like for people like us growin up You gotta call me man, I'll be the biggest fan you'll ever lose Sincerely yours, weswes19 -- P.S. We should get free sms too {Chorus: Dido} [weswes19 as 'Stan'] Dear Mister-I'm-Too-Good-To-Call-Or-Write-My-Fans, this'll be the last package I ever send your ass It's been six months and still no word - I don't deserve it? I know you got my last two letters; I wrote the addresses on 'em perfect So this is my E-mail I'm sending you, I hope you read it I'm in the car right now, I'm doing 90 on the freeway Hey Orange, I drank a fifth of a shot of vodka :lol: , you dare me to drive? You know the song by Phil Collins, "In the Air of the Night" I had it a ringtone, I thought it'd work but it didn't, then I found this BB I managed to workround it That's kinda how this is, you coulda rescued me from drowning Now it's too late - I'm on a 1000 Posts now, I'm drowsy and all I wanted was a lousy letter or a call I hope you know I ripped +ALL+ of your pictures off the wall I loved you Orange, we coulda been together, think about it You ruined it now, I hope you can't sleep and you dream about it And when you dream I hope you can't sleep and you SCREAM about it I hope your conscience EATS AT YOU and you can't BREATHE without me See Orange; {*screaming*} Shut up woman! I'm tryin to talk! Hey Orange, that's my girlfriend screamin in the trunk but I didn't slit her throat, I just tied her up, see I ain't like you cause if she suffocates she'll suffer more, and then she'll die too Well, gotta go, I'm almost at the bridge now Oh sh*t, I forgot, how'm I supposed to send this E-mail out? me phones just crashed. {*car tires squeal*} {*CRASH*} .. {*brief silence*} .. {*LOUD splash*} {Chorus: Dido} [Orange] Dear weswes19, I meant to write you sooner but I just been busy You said your girlfriend's on orange now, how far along is she? Look, I'm really flattered you would call your daughter that and here's an autograph for your brother, I wrote it on the top up card I'm sorry I didn't send you any games, I musta missed you Don't think I did that stuff intentionally just to diss you But what's this you said about you like to cut your wrists too? I say that s**t just clownin dogg, c'mon - how freaked up is you? You got some issues weswes19, I think you need some counseling to help your ass from bouncing off the walls when you get down some And what's this crap about Free sms? That type of crap'll make me not want us to meet each other I really think you and your girlfriend need each other or maybe you just need to treat her to a better phone I hope you get to read this E-mail, I just hope it reaches you in time before you hurt yourself, I think that you'll be doin just fine if you relax a little, I'm glad I inspire you but weswes19 why are you so mad? Try to understand, that I do want you as a customer I just don't want you to do some crazy sh*t I seen this one newbee on the news a couple weeks ago that made me sick Some dude was drunk and drove his car over a bridge and had his girlfriend in the trunk, and she was Playing with his Spv and in the car they found a Phone, but they didn't say who it was to Come to think about, his name was.. it was you Damn! ;) :D :wink: :lol: :D :wink: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest wideawake Posted January 21, 2003 Report Share Posted January 21, 2003 Crimminsky, now that is funny, your talents are wasted. I think your tune should be sent instead of weswes19 email, I think you would get a more positive response from big O. And they want to stiffle creativity with certification. ;) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Monolithix [MVP] Posted January 21, 2003 Report Share Posted January 21, 2003 Spam it to every O e-mail address and news website you can think of. See what the response is, you could become a star :!: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest crimminsky Posted January 21, 2003 Report Share Posted January 21, 2003 I hope weswes19 finds it funny too ;) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest lutzh Posted January 21, 2003 Report Share Posted January 21, 2003 crimminsky, i have tears in my eyes! it hurts to laugh that much! ATT TO THE MODS: THIS THREAT HAS TO BE (!) POSTET IN THE BEGINNERS SECTION! it may put down blood pressure of p*ssed new spv users... cheers, lutz Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Thurstan Posted January 21, 2003 Report Share Posted January 21, 2003 yep - and nothing personal - but Orange will just see you as an eccentric or a nutter and delete your email without reading it. I know for a fact. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest lutzh Posted January 21, 2003 Report Share Posted January 21, 2003 well then try to sing it on the orange mailboxes... :-) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DJHope Posted January 21, 2003 Report Share Posted January 21, 2003 PAUL STICKY PLEASE PLEASE ;) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest weswes19 Posted January 21, 2003 Report Share Posted January 21, 2003 LOL LOVE THE STAN SONG lol thats the funniest thing Ive seen on here well I work in IT support and I know that any e-mail like that we are made to look at and delating it would get us sacked sorry fot the bad grammer I was peeved thats all I spent £130 on a door stop Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest crimminsky Posted January 22, 2003 Report Share Posted January 22, 2003 well I'm sticking with mine, cause I'm made out of glue........theres another song here somewhere..... ;) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Bazz Posted January 22, 2003 Report Share Posted January 22, 2003 (sorry joining late so I'll ignore the Stan stuff :-) funny, but you obviously have waaaaay too much time on your hands Anyway back to the original post). Oh my God Weswes. You're sooooo cool. I and all the regulars on this board think you're amazing. I mean you work in a building with a whole 3000 other staff so you must be dead important. You're beautifully worded e-mail will really make Orange sit up and listen. I'm sure they've been sitting in board rooms with powerpoint presentations from marketing gurus thinking everything is fine but now you've written that cutting but professional e-mail they will realise their folly and promote you to CEO and release the update tomorrow and then everything will be beautiful! Thanks so much for improving my life! Barry P.S. Now that's how you do sarcasm! P. P. S. Angry Barry is back - let the flames begin! :-) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest HelloDave Posted January 22, 2003 Report Share Posted January 22, 2003 OK, while I think Barry's post was a little on the, umm, unsubtle side, Weswes - please tell me you didn't send that e-mail exactly as you posted it to Orange? I'm sorry to say with spelling and grammar like that it's not going to be taken seriously, it looks vaguely reminiscent of (for example) what a 13year old "warez d00d" or "hax0r" would write to a "loser" threatening him with legal action! SPV users are going to be laughed at if we send Orange comments like that; I agree with the majority of this thread that if I recieved that e-mail I would just laugh and delete it! OT: On a seperate point - very nice version of Stan crimminsky, even though the only good bit in the original is Dido's ;) Ooh - my 150th post! I should get out more... :roll: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest MECX Posted January 22, 2003 Report Share Posted January 22, 2003 Oh my God Weswes. You're sooooo cool. I and all the regulars on this board think you're amazing. I mean you work in a building with a whole 3000 other staff so you must be dead important. You're beautifully worded e-mail will really make Orange sit up and listen. I'm sure they've been sitting in board rooms with powerpoint presentations from marketing gurus thinking everything is fine but now you've written that cutting but professional e-mail they will realise their folly and promote you to CEO and release the update tomorrow and then everything will be beautiful! Thanks so much for improving my life My god you cant have a rant in this place without getting blasted---the guy was just showing how pissed off he was----now ladys put the handbags down :roll: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Bazz Posted January 22, 2003 Report Share Posted January 22, 2003 ;) OK I'll admit my reply was maybe a little bit harsh... No offence meant! On the serious side, I don't mind people having a rant (God knows I like one!), but an e-mail like that ain't gonna be taken seriously at all. I'm guessing (hoping) he didn't actually send it in that form and was just having a rant here with it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest madu Posted January 22, 2003 Report Share Posted January 22, 2003 T., you know for a fact coz you are.....?? Anyway, NICE ONE Crimmz!! ;) :lol: :lol: Yes, please do send it to O - spam spam spam - I'd read it! And fwd it on to all my colleagues (if I were like T. an O. person hehe) take it easy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest cepheus1 Posted January 22, 2003 Report Share Posted January 22, 2003 Hey weswes19 ;) You asked for feedback. Letters of complaint should be carefully prepared and presented, constructive, spelt correctly, concise and never sarcastic or threatening in their tone. Unfortunately your e-mail fails on every one of the above points :lol: You make some valid points, but if you...and the rest of the Smart Phone community are to have our grievances taken seriously...please get someone to re-write your e-mail...and use your spell checker (F7) :wink: ....and you say that if you deleted an email of complaint you would be dismissed by your company...how would they know if you recieved an email and deleted it :?: People in any Customer Service role take an awful lot of S**T :!: In my experience they try a lot harder to help if you are nice :!: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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